The Art of Mumbo Jumbo

Have you ever listened to a business school graduate speak?

Unless you’ve been reverse-engineered like he has been, you can barely understand a word.

That’s right, reverse-engineered.

These business schools specialize in reverse-engineering. They take bright people and make them stupid.

They turn diamonds into lumps of coal.

They do it with stupid juice and plenty of it.

It’s ladled out in pitcher loads.

Their graduates speak in eco-babble.

Now maybe you are thinking this eco-babble is legitimate jargon, but if you thought that you would be wrong.

Yes, other professionals talk in jargon. Doctors do it all the time.

The difference is that doctors aren’t speaking bullshit.

Aortas actually exist.

Economists specialize in bullshit.

And boy do they lay it on thick.

I think they have a man with a  machine cranking this BS out faster than a human being  can possibly learn it.

They say no two economists can agree. I think that’s wrong.  I don’t think even one economist can agree with himself from one minute to the next.

I think he forgets what he says before it comes out of his mouth.

Terms like weak dollar, bubbles, overvalued dollar, trade deficits, domestic savings only exist to intimidate you into accepting his authority.

Phrases like ‘run on the bond market’ sweeten his supremacy.  

Throw in short-term treasuries, LIBOR, disparity in bond yields, and you’ve got a genius.

God speaks when he talks about the Fed holding onto government debt.

Hey, genius, the Fed is the government.  But we’ll pretend it isn’t.

Of course they all predicted the collapse of 2007.

Sure.

When I was a kid I was totally impressed with this soothsayer Jeanne Dixon who supposedly predicted JFKs assassination.

I asked my dad how this was possible.  What special powers did she have?

My dad who could dismiss entire industry’s with a phrase said to me: It’s easy when you predict everything under the sun.