Listen Up, Fools

Hey, motherfuckers in charge, are you listening?

Can you hear me?

Hey, listen up, clearheads.

Mr. CIA agent, are you present?

Good.

Do you know why you motherfuckers are going to lose?

It’s not because you’re not smart. You have plenty of biological smarts.

It’s not even because you’re outnumbered.

As you know full well, there’s too many of us, and too few of you.

Sure, you can hold us back with lies for a little while, but in the long run the flooding waters are going to overpower the gates and wipe you off the fucking planet.

And it’ll be a better planet.

You are all going down.

It’s just a matter of time.

But that’s not the real reason you’re going down.

You’re going down because we live in a moral universe. It works like a giant mousetrap, and God is the person who guards it. Naturally, you guys are the rat that is nibbling at the cheese.

It takes time for you to nibble enough cheese to spring the trap. That’s why it always appears to you that your little schemes are working and that no one will be the wiser.

Of course you are never satisfied with taking a little, and so in time the trap gets sprung.

God has been minding the trap the whole time. God sees everything.

God sees that your actions are totally immoral.

Do you have any idea how many people you have hurt?

Look, I’m staying right now at this Marriott Courtyard.

Now, it used to be that a maid would come by and clean the room on a daily basis.

You do remember her, right?

This is the unskilled laborer that you paid minimum wage to.

She needed that little extra cash for her family.

Well, I guess that was too much money for her, right? I guess your greed-mongering businessmen, your Wharton School graduates, figured that they could take advantage of the pandemic and cut housekeeping costs.

What a bonanza for you, right?

I imagine the stock price of your criminal corporation went up when the bottom line was cut.

Jim Cramer and the other CNBC jerk-offs probably got an erection.

Wow! You guys are winners.

You’re like your friends at the New England Patriots who take advantage of the loopholes and the technicalities of the game to gain an unfair advantage.

NFL broadcasters regularly gloss over the Patriots’ videotaping of opponent’s behavior during practice and games, their rummaging through opponent’s trash cans for data, their deflating of the game balls, their communicating tells to players on the field, and who knows what else.

You’re like those NFL quarterbacks who take advantage of the opposing team having too many men on the field in order to quickly hike the ball so as to get a penalty against their opponent.

Misguided NFL broadcasters drooled over Saint Peyton Manning when he pulled this immoral trick time and time again.

You’re like Derek Jeter when he faked getting hit by a ball so as to gain advantage over the Tampa Bay Rays. You remember that incident, don’t you?

His cocksucker buddies at ESPN, who drool over his exploits, rallied behind him and called his cheating maneuver gamesmanship.

You’re like a particular ESPN morning broadcaster from years ago who said that it was okay to go after an opposing player’s injured elbow in a hockey game.

It’s not okay.

Now, listen up, cocksuckers. I’m going to teach you something that they don’t teach you at the Wharton school.

When you play another player, you want to beat that player when he or she is at his best.

When you have to injure someone or cheat in order to win, you are not defeating that player when he is at his best. You have immorally compromised him.

When you win, you want everybody to know that your opponent was in full operating condition. You don’t want any excuses to be made.

When you have to cheat in order to win, what does that say about you?

Not much.

This is why you are going down. Your actions are immoral. You take advantage of your privileged status in order to game the rules in order to weaken other people.

You confuse championships, Super Bowls and lots of money with victory in life.

You were taught wrong.

God sees everything that you do, and God is just waiting, biding time.

God is minding the giant mousetrap that’s going to cook your ass like spam on a griddle.

You’re going down, motherfuckers, just like those worthless rulers before you.

And it’s going to come sooner than you think.

Sincerely,

Archer Crosley

Copyright 2021 Archer Crosley All Rights Reserved