Jack and Lee 3

One of the problems I had in planning this assassination was my minimal brain dysfunction. It takes me a long time to get things done.

I am very easily distracted.

Now, you would think this would disqualify me for planning an assassination, but it doesn’t.

You see, you have to take the good with the bad.

It’s my minimal brain dysfunction that allows me to integrate with regular people like Jack and Lee.

If I was well balanced and perfect, no regular Joe would accept me as a regular person. And you need regular people to pull off an assassination.

Who is going to kill JFK? Somebody from the University Club? Forget it.

Just today I got thrown off on a tangent. I became preoccupied with free trade. What does free trade have to do with my job?

Absolutely nothing.

Yet absolutely everything.

I work for the CIA, my friend.

Here is what I wrote.


There are need of vast tariffs everywhere in the world.

The only people free trade benefits are the wealthy who can’t be satisfied with a little money.

They need to conquer the world.

Fuck them.

They make life miserable for the rest of us.

They relentlessly consume, absorb and grow fat.

Market share is their currency

Growth for the sake of growth.

Quality only if it’s absolutely necessary.

If there were a parallel world circling earth they would need to conquer that also.

One world would not be enough.

They make me sick.

What’s so wrong with owning a small shop?

Whats so wrong with making a few people happy?

“No way to that,” sing the Fat Pigs.

These fuckers need it all.

They consume it all

In the name of Democracy.

Fuck Democracy.

Democracy is a dictator controlled by the Fat Pigs.

Free Trade is a code word for exploitation where in the dark recesses of the world they the Fat Pigs can work their slaves for 18 hours per day without bathroom breaks uninhibited by the morass of regulations the First World imposes upon them.

They pay their dictator to do so.

That’s what free trade is all about.

Fuck free trade.

Praise God for tariffs.

Praise God Almighty for tariffs.

For tariffs set me free.

Tariffs are a castle that protects me from my oppressor.

Tariffs are a barrier that keeps me safe and sound at night.

Tariffs protect my family.

Tariffs provide a healthy home for my kids.

I love tarrifs.

I imbibe tariffs.

I embrace tariffs.

I have sex with tariffs.

Tariffs have sex with me.

Tariffs and I are in looooooooove.

Well, all I can say is that there is a lot of stress in planning an assassination.

Stress will always find an outlet.



Copyright 2019   Archer Crosley   All Rights Reserved

This is a work of fiction based upon real events.


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